# Depression, Anxiety, and Relationships: A Review



## David Baxter PhD (Mar 7, 2011)

*Depression and Relationships: A Review*
Merely Me
Monday, February 28, 2011

Many of the questions we get here on *MyDepressionConnection* are about relationships. Girlfriends, boyfriends and spouses write in to ask how to help their depressed partner. Others ask how they can save their relationship despite having to cope with a mood disorder. There are still others who wonder if they will ever have a romantic relationship because their depression or other mental disorders make it difficult to meet people and sustain connections. Although there are no easy answers, there are ways to tackle these issues of how to make a relationship work when you have depression or a related mental disorder.

This post offers a review of the many articles we have on MyDepressionConnection about depression and relationships. Included are also member posts which have generated a lot of open and honest discussion within our community. 




*Anxiety, Depression and Dating *

*Depression and Dating*
*Social Anxiety and Dating*
*The Fear of Intimacy*
*An Interview with the Founder of NoLongerLonely* ( a dating and friendship service for people with mental illnesses)
*How to Help Your Depressed Partner*

*Tips for Identifying Depression in Loved Ones from Lewis and Clark* 
*How NOT to Give Verbal Support to a Depressed Loved One* 
*What to Do When Your Partner is Depressed*
*Things we Wish People Would Say to Us When We are Depressed* 
*Trying to Save Relationships Despite Depression?s Impact* 
*Treating Someone who Doesn?t Want Treatment*
*The Limitations of Love when Your Partner is Depressed*

*Depression and Relationships: When Love is Not Enough* 
*Can Love Cure Depression?*
*Is Your Partner Depressed or Just Not That Into You?* 
*The Emotionally Abusive Relationship *

*How and When to Leave an Emotionally Abusive Relationship* 
*Ten Signs that You May be Involved in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship*
*Early Warning Signs of Emotional Abuse*
*Depressed Men and the Impact of Emotional Abuse* 
*Are You in an Abusive Relationship?*
*Mood Disorders and Sexual Intimacy*

*Antidepressants and Libido*
*Depression and Sex Addiction*
*Bipolar Disorder and Sexuality*
*Sexual Intimacy Anxiety*
*The Difference between Male and Female Depression*

*Depression in Men Vs. Women*
*Understanding Your Wife?s or Girlfriend?s Depression *

*Women, Hormones, and Depression*
*How Depression Affects Women*
*Postpartum Depression*
*Understanding Male Depression*

*Men and Depression*
*How do Men Experience Depression?*
*To the Partners of Depressed Men*
*A Man Depressed-The Problem of Treatment*
*A Man Depressed-Controlling and Out of Control*
*Why Depressed Men Don?t Talk*
*Member Posts and Questions about Depression and Relationships*

*I think I keep screwing up my relationships*
*Feels like my relationship is killing me*
*How to break up from a bad relationship?*
*A cycle of repeated failing relationships*
*Connection between depression and a ?falling out of love? feeling*
*My depressed boyfriend just broke up with me*
*Related Mental Disorders and Relationships*

*Anxiety in Relationships*
*Bipolars in Relationships: Emotional Safety is Paramount*
*ADHD in Relationships: The Experts Speak Out*
*Schizophrenia and Serious Relationship Issues*


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## ailsa (Mar 9, 2011)

I found the information on mental ruminating under "Women and Depression" to be enlightening.  It's a big contributor to my sadness.  didn't know there was a name for that.  Thank you for posting these links,

Ailsa


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## bloodwood (Mar 9, 2011)

Hi Ailsa
Both my girlfriend and I have a problem with rumination. One of her doctors referred to it as "obssessive rumination". For me the name seemed so appropriate because when the head gets going there seems no stopping it except finding some other mentally engrossing task.
I could never decide whether the depression started up the ruminating or vice-versa. That article seems to indicate that it is simply more of a cycle.
I always knew it was tied to self esteem and also my sugar levels and control ( Type 2).

Peter


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## ailsa (Mar 9, 2011)

Hi Peter,

I am also Type 2.  I really hate dealing with it since I am on insulin, and I'm annoyed I got it in the first place.  I had full blown diabetes before my family doc caught it even although I had been complaining of blurry ision and deep fatigue every time I saw him for the two previous years.  I wish I had been able to catch it in the pre-diabetes stage, but here I am anyway.  I also have ADD and forget sometimes to take it.  So now I carry it with me all the time.

You are right about the compulsive ruminating.  Now, when thee thoughs come, I try to do something physical or play an online game or do a crossword that diverts my attention and simply refuse to think about anything else.  It works sometimes.  I see you have come to the same conclusion.

Warmly,

Ailsa


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## bloodwood (Mar 9, 2011)

Hello,
Cross word puzzles and computer games are my usual release/distraction.
I love doing woodworking and working on my property but sometimes as I do the thoughts get going. I find very often that if a conflict event has occured and my self esteem is poor this can often lead to a period of rumination. When I am feeling good about myself and strong within myself it usually does not happen. It truly is an internalizing thing. Exercise can help me for the same reasons, I'm just not always good at choosing that option.

Diabetes was in my family and I was aware of it. The day I walked in for my diagnosis I had already figured out that I had it. It was more of a formal confirmation. Looking back I know I was diabetic for a couple of years before diagnosis. If I had known early enough about the healthy lifestyle delaying onset I just might have gone that route. Who knows. 
Working on my property and other projects keeps me very active and that helps me mentally and physically.
I am sorry that you must take insulin. That must be a bother.
Peter


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