# Is abortion ever right?



## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

Ok, so since im depressed and on a roll with my ranting/venting. I may as well get this out in the open. Especially since this is anonymous.

Can abortion ever be the right choice?... After I was raped, I soon found out I was pregnant.....and the obvious choice was to have an abortion.
So I did....part of me hates myself for not feeling so bad....and the other part of me feels awful for taking a life.
But...In a circumstance such as rape......is it the right decision?
All I knew was I was in grade 12 and there was no way I was having a baby - let alone one that was the offspring of a crime.....even if I had decided to go through with it, there was no way I would have been able to live with myself keeping him/her. Or the guilt of giving a baby to a family knowing how it came about......Am I wrong for making the choice I did?
And if I am right in the choice I made, why does it feel so wrong at the same time.....


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## Banned (Sep 12, 2008)

MonkeyMunch,

I'm sorry for what you've been through.  You've certainly been through alot and I hope you will take up people's advice on here to get some therapy to help you deal with these feelings of guilt and shame.  

Abortion is an intensely personal choice, and while we all have opinions on it, I don't believe anyone can fairly say that what you did was right or wrong.  You made the best choice that you could, at the time, with the information you had and the situation you were in.  It was the right choice for you, so what anyone else thinks now should be non-significant.

You may be feeling guilt and shame over your decision, however, given your history that you've shared with us, I think many, many other things are feeding into that guilt and shame.


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## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

Thanks for the support on this...
I haven't been able to talk to anyone about this...It's a 'touchy' subject to say the least....each year that goes by i think oh...he/she would be turning one....he/she would be turning 2.
I used to be SO against abortion when I was younger....but going through it changes how you feel....especially when it's forced...
I just seriously cannot picture myself having been able to love that child the same was as I would if I had given consent and actually wanted a child...I just can't...

Hopfully my reasoning isnt too selfish.....and thanks for allowing me to vent.


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## sister-ray (Sep 12, 2008)

MM,

You did the right thing considering what Had happened to you, so please dont feel gulity, you made the right choice for you at that time. I had an abortion many years ago, alot of people then tryed to talk me out of it and I think they where the selfish ones,  considering my living situation at the time, my health, medication I was on, the fact I was drinking heavily and many other factors there was no way I could have had a baby and looked after it, the people who where trying to talk me out of it I think where endangering that babys life with the way I was at the time, by having an abortion I was doing the best for the life inside me, saving he/she from not being cared for or maybe having health issues due to the tablets I was on that could have been dangerous, its perfectly normal to think of how she/he might have been now etc I still do it but I dont feel gulity as I know that child would have had an aweful life what I did was for the best for us both.  Im just wondering whether others are making you feel you where wrong? I still get people nowadays when I tell them saying that I was wrong, dont let anyone else make you feel bad about what you did they have no right. sorry for the long reply but its something I feel quite strongly about  :hug:


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## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

I haven't really talked to anyone about this issue...I was embarrased by it so I kept it to myself...I thought if people knew they would judge me for it.
I did tell one of my close friends and it turned into a really nasty fight.....So after that I just kept it to myself, but the more I go on keeping it a secret the more it eats away at me


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## Cat Dancer (Sep 12, 2008)

MonkeyMunch, I think it would be so beneficial for you if you could find a good therapist. I believe I read that you've been in therapy before? Would you consider going back? A good therapist won't judge you no matter what and you can really get things out in the open there and deal with them. 

I'm sorry you're going through so much and I hope you can get some relief and peace from all this pain.


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## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

I have such a hard time trusting people.....The therapist I had before was AMAZING, I loved her so much! and Im worried I'll never find a therapist I get along with well.
I dont even think I have TIME to see a therapist haha....I know that sounds pretty dumb.....

Thanks for caring and trying to help....Its nice to see that people who don't even really know me do care


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## Into The Light (Sep 12, 2008)

therapy is something you make time for. what about going back to your previous therapist?


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## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

Unfortunately she moved to the states! She left me! She was awesome....but at that point in my life I was 19 and things were finally starting to get better, so I think I needed that push into the "real world".....but now things are slipping back to how they were.....only a year later... ugh


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## Into The Light (Sep 12, 2008)

in that case start shopping for one  it really is well worth it.


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## suewatters1 (Sep 12, 2008)

If it were me I probably would had an abortion also. I don't believe in it but under these circumstances that is another story. I would be reminded everyday I would see that child where he came from and does the child look like the father and it would probably bring back Terrible flash back to the day you were raped.

The was a episode last year on the TV show House where a girl was in the hospital and House discovered she was raped and pregnant and she was going through the same feelings you are going through. By the end of the episode it was revealed that she had an abortion. It was in season 3 the episode called One Day, One Room.
Myself I would be worried that the child would become like the father. Evil

This is only my opinion mind you. You have to decide in your heart what you truly believe/ your gut feeling.

Sue


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## Eye Stigmata (Sep 12, 2008)

Well...What's done is done I guess. I just have to move forward from it...and hope that this never ever happens to me again...or anyone for that matter.

But you know what they say, Karma is ********....He'll get what he deserves...


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