# Anxiety/Depression Group



## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

I start a long awaited 10 week therapy group dealing with anxiety and low grade depression. Should be fun (sarcastic) as I am already anxious about the group. And everyone in the room will be dealing with the same thing. Cool!

On a serious note, I am looking forward to it even though I may have to really force myself to stay and to come back for the next session. This seems to become more difficult as I get older. Especially because I look and seem so easy going and put together on the outside.


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## Banned (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Good luck with your group, LL.  I can appreciate the anxiety surrounding it...I don't think I could ever do a group - I'm way too shy and scared!  If they got me to go once, I'd probably never go back...so yay for you!  :clap:

Let us know how it goes after...


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Thanks Turtle - need all the encouragement I can get.:teehee:


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## Jazzey (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I think it's great LL - When does it "officially" start?   And I know this is tough - I'd be running for the hills myself.  But I know that you'll be fine.  You're a strong chick and you've come so far...

You'll have to let us know how it goes.


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## NicNak (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

That is great Ladylore.  I am sure everyone else there will be feeling nervous too.  The group leader would be aware of that and I am sure they have ways to  help you all through it.

That is a great step Ladylore.  I am proud of you for doing that.  Keep us posted too ok?  :hug:


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## Halo (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Glad to hear that the group is finally starting up...that is awesome 

Yes I am sure that you are nervous but as you said, I am sure that everyone else will be as well so you are not alone.

Looking forward to hearing more 

Take care
:hug: :friends:


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

The group starts Wednesday, 1:30 - 3:30. I will keep you posted and give the rest of you the homework assignments if you would like. 

PS - Jazzey, you can call me chick anytime you like. I like that. :dance:


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## Halo (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

No thanks on the homework....I am not getting my own homework from my therapist done, talk about avoidance  :lol:


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## Jazzey (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

:lol: Thanks LL...It's almost as if you snuck into my brain for a minute.  I was debating wether to edit my text     And I'd love to hear about the homework.  Although I won't guarantee that I'll do it.   In a week from today, I'm starting trauma therapy - And feeling very "traumatized" about it :lol:


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I let you guys know what happened in the group and the homework I got - you doing is optional of course. 

Maybe if I keep up with the updates it will force me to keep going. I am accountable to all of you.

As you know Jazzey, I went through a year of trauma therapy myself. I would be interested to know how that goes for you. I know all therapists work differently, but trauma therapy was one of the best things I could have done for myself. I hope you have the same experience.


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## Banned (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

There's homework?  

I'd be a definite dropout.  I don't do homework.


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## Jazzey (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Thanks LL.  And I'd love for you to share your experiences with us.  And I'll gladly make you accountable for attending. 

As for the trauma therapy, I had indeed remembered that you'd been through it. And I will share my experiences.  I may also ask you a few questions at some point if you don't mind...


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Don't mind at all.


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## white page (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Wishing you good luck with your group , it is really brave of you to go , It will go better than you think .  It may also be fun , in the sense of , more enjoyable than you expect .  You only have to see the posts here ,it shows that being depressed doesn't mean that we can't laugh about it or lose our sense of humour. LL  Do you know many there will be in the group ?
I will be thinking of you . 



> Maybe if I keep up with the updates it will force me to keep going. I am accountable to all of you.



You bet you are , we are all  right behind you in this !


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

They needed 10 to start the group.


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## Jazzey (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

...9 new friends LL.


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## white page (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*



Jazzey said:


> ...9 new friends LL.


Yey LL :thewave:  I'm sure there will be at least a couple you will click with , now don't forget , that you are going there for you , I know how easy it is to over empathise with the distress of others and forget about oneself .:hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

One good thing about this group is that we can't socialize with the other participants outside of group. Once it is finished, if we have clicked with someone then we can go for coffee, but not while the group is going on.

It is suppose to be treatment and the staff don't want any of us influencing anyone else in the group. This rule actually make me feel safer going.


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## Jazzey (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I think that's a great rule.  I could see how people with similar issues could jeopardize each other's successes here.


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## white page (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Sounds good Robyn . Great rule , I agree with Jazzey .


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## Halo (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I think that that is a good rule Ladylore.  And I will take a look at the homework but no guarantees


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## Halo (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Off topic discussion split and moved to here


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## ladylore (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Haven't read that particular thread yet. I go for a nap and look what happens.


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## boi (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

goodluck with group LL :dimples:


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## Into The Light (Mar 9, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

good luck ll!


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## ladylore (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I will write a bit more later as I am exhausted right now. All in all, the group went well. Today was introductions and a bit about goal setting. It's comforting to know that other people in the room had some of the same feelings that I have had. 

I am glad I am doing this for myself. Now to stay motivated for session 2. 

Wanted to add a bit of info while I thought of it. Changeways is the name of the program and it started out as a research project at UBC. The researcher opened up a private practice and this program is based on this agency's work: http://www.changeways.com


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## boi (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

that sounds great LL. Glad it went well...:cool2:


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## Jazzey (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Thanks LL -I thought about you today.  When your energy is back up a little, I'd love to hear about your impressions about it today...If you're up for it of course. :hug: :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

I will be - after a nap.


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## NicNak (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Hi Ladylore.  I am so happy your first day went well 

I get tired too sometimes if I think of things a lot before hand, then when I go and it is good, it is big relief and like weight off my shoulders.  It makes me tired too.

I hope you had a nice nap too.  :hug:


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## Halo (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

LL,

Glad that it went well today and I too look forward to hearing all about it....after your :zzz: of course


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## texasgirl (Mar 11, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Hi LL,

I hope your group goes well for you.  We don't have any groups around here, but I liked the ones I was in before.  Take care, am thinking of you.

:hug:

TG


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Here is the long awaited update - no homework guys, at least not for you. 

The group focuses more on depression then anxiety. The main topics this week were the "thoughts -feelings - behaviour model", basically how your thoughts lead to feelings and lead to behaviours. I learned this one in recovery.

The other topic we started on was goal setting. Writing out a list of everything I like to now and liked to do in the past. The main point was setting immediate goals. Something small and very manageable that can easily be achieved - for instance, paying one bill.

This helps with increasing motivation and energy. So the theory goes. 

I have tests I need to do this week to be completed by Wednesday. A generalized test, depression, test and one for anxiety.

There is some optional homework I can do - if I get to it I will. I don't remember what it is at the moment.

Have a great day guys and gals. :2thumbs:


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## white page (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Thanks for the update LL.  
sounds good so far , it must have been tiring the next day ,after the anxiety of new people and how it would be , do you feel reassured now .?  



> The other topic we started on was gaol setting. Writing out a list of everything I like to now and liked to do in the past. The main point was setting immediate goals. Something small and very manageable that can easily be achieved - for instance, paying one bill.



that's a good one , hmmmmmmm maybe I'll do that one 

thanks for sharing


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## Halo (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Thanks for sharing with us LL....the group sounds like it is starting off nicely but I am sure that it is exhausting in a way.

I look forward to hearing about next weeks homework :2thumbs:

Take care
:hug: :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

The odd thing is WP is that the first time I do anything it usually is good. It's going to the 2nd, 3rd, 4th.... sessions that are hard. 

Go figure.


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## white page (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Just lean on us so that it will continue to be good , we'll be here for you for the 
2nd, 3rd, 4th.... sessions .  It's similar to one to one therapy sessions , it seems to get tougher , the first one is almost exhilarating because we have finally got there .:hug:

as everyone has said ,we are right behind you .  
Where are you with the homework by the way ?


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Haven't even looked at it.


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## white page (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Tut Tut ,  :hug::heart:


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

It's only Friday.


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## David Baxter PhD (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*



ladylore said:


> The other topic we started on was gaol setting.



I hope you mean "goal" not "gaol"... 

_unless you made the mistake of smacking group members :smack: ... then it probably is gaol for you... _


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Sorry - forgot to spell check that one.


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## David Baxter PhD (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

Are you in solitary? Are you allowed visitors? Cakes? Muffins?


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## ladylore (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*

They let me out.  It's an outpatient group so they let us go home.


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## David Baxter PhD (Mar 13, 2009)

*Re: Start of Anxiety and Depression Group this week*



ladylore said:


> They let me out.  It's an outpatient group so they let us go home.


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## ladylore (Mar 18, 2009)

*Anxiety/Depression Therapy Group*

Came home from my second session today. Had a major panic attack before, during and after (still going on) the group.

I usually make every excuse in the book why I can't continue, don't want to go..... and drop out of almost any face to face group I have gone to. So minor miracle for me that I sat through the whole thing today.

I am so happy to be home. :jiggy:


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## Jazzey (Mar 18, 2009)

I'm happy that you stuck through with it LL   And I completely relate to the panick attacks...I hope that you won't drop out of this group...maybe stick with it a little longer?

But I'm also happy you're home now   (I also understand that feeling!)   :hug: :hug:


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## texasgirl (Mar 18, 2009)

Me, too, LL!  I sure hope that it's get easier soon.  And I'm glad you are home.

:support:

TG


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## ladylore (Mar 18, 2009)

TG and Jazzey,

Ironic isn't it. An anxiety therapy group causes me anxiety.

More will follow later as it was a great goup. I think a cuppa tea is in order.


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## Jazzey (Mar 18, 2009)

...It would give me anxiety too LL .  Enjoy that cuppa! :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 18, 2009)

Now I am having a hotflash folks and I am not in menopause. 

Today we made a list of the problems we were experiencing - family, work, social, lifestyle

Out of that list we picked one of the problems we wanted to work on. Mine was anxiety and social isolation. The ultimate goal: is to be able to be actively social with-in a group with the minimum of anxiety

I have other problems that I want to work on but this is the major one. Another goal is to take better care of myself.

Then we broke it down into a goal I could do this week. Mine was a bit ambitious - of course I wanted to have a dinner party. 

The main theme of the session is to break down the goal into bits and pieces. The overall saying being: If you are feeling overwhelmed it's still too much.

So my 3 goals for this week:

Sweep and wash the floors by Friday.

Call a friend and see if we can arrange to get together (making the call is the goal - anything else is icing on the cake)

Listen to one of the relaxation meditations on the CD that was handed out today.


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## NicNak (Mar 18, 2009)

Sorry your feeling hot flashed Ladylore.  Sounds like you had a big day with your anxiety group.

Maybe that medication CD might be handy now to try?  

I dont like the hot flashes either I get with anxiety.  Maybe open up a window for fresh air.  

You are in my thoughts Ladylre.  :hug:


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## Halo (Mar 18, 2009)

LL,

Glad to hear that although it was uncomfortable and increased your anxiety, that you stuck with the group and made it home safely.  I have known that "I am home and safe" feeling as well 

I do think that you may have been a little ambitious with the dinner party but I think that the goals that you made for the week are great.  I hope that you accomplish what you set out to do.

You are doing great LL, keep it up :2thumbs:

Take care


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## forgetmenot (Mar 19, 2009)

Way to go Ladylore. As Jazzey said. I too would have anxiety but what an accomplishment for you continue to do well Ladylore. 

Take care 

mary


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## Into The Light (Mar 19, 2009)

thanks for sharing ladylore. i liked this quote and will try to remember it.



> The overall saying being: If you are feeling overwhelmed it's still too much.


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## ladylore (Mar 19, 2009)

Your welcome ITL,

I hope it made sense as I was quite tired yesterday. I have been exhausted all day today. Didn't think a few hours would take so much out of me.


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## NicNak (Mar 19, 2009)

Are you feeling still hot flashed Ladylore?  

I can only imagine how exhausting the anxiety group would have been.

I hope you get a good rest.  I am proud of you that you are going to the anxiety group.  :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 19, 2009)

Why thank you NN. Today I feel like I have the flu.

Before I went to the group I called my addiction therapist for a check-in. I told her that whatever I have said to her in the past regarding the reasons I stop going to groups, programs after the first session are all hogwash.

I don't understand it at all. I am nervous the first time but the second time I have full blown panic that last hours. And it doesn't happen all the time but it has been a regular occurrence in my life since the year began.

At least yesterday I knew I wasn't going to die or get sick in the room or afterwords. I just waited it out.

Any suggestions on how to deal with this? I am all out of ideas. 

Thanks all.


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## Halo (Mar 19, 2009)

I don't have any ideas of how not to have a panic attack or experience anxiety while in the group but my first thought was.....if you don't have it for the first group but do for the second, have you ever experienced a third group?  From what you have indicated it sounds like you have stopped the groups in the past after the second terrifying group.  If you did go back the third time, did you have a lot of panic and anxiety as well?

I know that what I posted may not be the most helpful but I am just trying to gain a better understanding of the group process for you.

Take care
:hug: :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 19, 2009)

I have to admit the only time I have stuck it out is a drop-in group at the addiction recovery centre. I usually don't even make it to a second session because of the panic and I make up some excuse in attempt to stop the anxiety.

A couple of years ago I went to a therapist run, woman's recovery group and I lasted two sessions and dropped out. I managed NA for a year and a half but I put that in a different category. But I eventually dropped that because of the anxiety and a few other reasons. But anxiety was definitely one of them.


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## Halo (Mar 20, 2009)

Given that you really haven't made an attempt at a third group, I would try to go and see how your anxiety and panic is.  I think that you made a good point here:



> I knew I wasn't going to die or get sick in the room or afterwords. I just waited it out.



Do you have anything that you can hold in your hand to help ground you.  I now have something that I hold when I get anxious or overwhelmed and it really helps to remind me that I am safe, grounded and cared for.

I really don't have any further suggestions at this time but if I think of anything I will post it.  Maybe others will come up with what has helped them in the past.

Take care
:hug: :friends:


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## ladylore (Mar 20, 2009)

The post in itself helps Halo.


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## Jazzey (Mar 20, 2009)

I hope you're feeling better today LL.


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## Halo (Mar 20, 2009)

Your welcome Ladylore....glad I could help :hug: :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 20, 2009)

The support is priceless, even if no can tell me what is going on. I do hope the third session will be smoother Halo.

And yes Jazzey I am feelinging better. Ears are plugged today mind you so it may be a bit of a cold.:hug:


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## forgetmenot (Mar 20, 2009)

Take care Ladylore best wishes mary


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## Into The Light (Mar 20, 2009)

ladylore, can you identify any specific thoughts that go through your mind that trigger the anxiety when you are at the group?


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## ladylore (Mar 20, 2009)

Some thoughts would be:

Nothing is really happening and I am safe.
Stay in control.
Only (how many more minutes) to go.

But before the group it's:

Why am I anxious? Is there a reason?
What is the reason?
Can I do this?
Will I be ok?

Stuff like that.


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## Into The Light (Mar 20, 2009)

what would be the worst thing that could happen at the group, in your mind?


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## ladylore (Mar 20, 2009)

I am not sure if it's about the group or not - good question.

The worst thing that could happen would be being told I am not living up to my potential and I am just lazy.

Come to think of it, all this may have to do with school experiences which were not the greatest.

The other thing that comes to mind is worrying about the toll it will take on my emotionally. Will I be able to keep it together? And/or - Do I look so together that I will not get the help I need?


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## Into The Light (Mar 20, 2009)

i don't think you need to worry about not getting the help you need - because you've already been accepted to the group. i can't see any reason why help would be withheld from you now.

when you talk about the toll it will take on you emotionally - are you concerned about getting triggered?


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## ladylore (Mar 21, 2009)

> when you talk about the toll it will take on you emotionally - are you concerned about getting triggered?



I don't know. I will have to think about that one.

---------- Post added later and automatically merged ---------- 




> So my 3 goals for this week:
> 
> Sweep and wash the floors by Friday.
> 
> ...



Swept floors (haven't washed them yet)
Called and left a message with my friend.

Hell - I even talked to my sister today. 

I haven't picked up the CD as of yet.


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## Halo (Mar 21, 2009)

ladylore said:


> Swept floors (haven't washed them yet)
> Called and left a message with my friend.
> 
> Hell - I even talked to my sister today.
> ...



Sounds like you are making good progress and you still have a few days to go before your next group....keep it up, am proud of you :2thumbs:


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2009)

way to go ladylore! :yahoo:


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## ladylore (Mar 25, 2009)

I skipped the group today. I woke up with strong anxiety. Once it stopped I really didn't want to do anything that would start it up again.

I have no idea if I will be able to continue with this group. Groups of people are what causes the most anxiety. I just don't know how worth it it is to continue.


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## Jazzey (Mar 25, 2009)

Am I right in thinking you've only attended 2 sessions Robyn?  If I'm right, I don't know that I would give up so quickly.  

What makes you want to leave?  Why do you think that these sessions aren't going to work for you?  Is there a possibility that you're following old patterns on this one?   Are you considering letting it go because of the other members?

:hug:

I know - sorry, many questions but the answers have to come from you.


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## forgetmenot (Mar 25, 2009)

Hie ladylore sorry you are feeling so anxious today.  Hope you will be able to regroup and try again for the next session.  You are doing so well don't give up yet  best wishes mary


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## ladylore (Mar 25, 2009)

Your right, I have gone to the first 2 sessions.

Yes, it's old patterns Jazzey. One that is extremely uncomfortable. I don't know how to break this one. It has nothing to do with anyone in the group nor with the sessions themselves. 

I don't like feeling terrified (who does). I know I am safe and that nothing is really going on. I am at a loss for words on this one.


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## Jazzey (Mar 25, 2009)

Yes, I recognize this pattern from my own repertoire LL. 

Having said that, you're right, no one likes feeling uncomfortable.  But sometimes the fear of feeling uncomfortable keeps us from trying new things, sometimes without our having the benefit of understanding where the discomfort comes from.  This is a new opportunity to test out those limits LL, maybe push those boundaries a little further?....

I hope that you'll give it another try next week. :hug:


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## suewatters1 (Mar 25, 2009)

I just had a thought.  Could it be that by going to more then 2 sessions means you would have to open up yourself more to group?  Like disclosing more about yourself and the reason your there and that maybe that terrifies you?

Just a thought.

I hope that find out what causes you to panic like that. 

Sue


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## Halo (Mar 25, 2009)

LL,

Sorry to hear that you did not make it to the group but I do remember you saying that it was a past pattern of yours to not continue with any group past the second session.  I really hope that you reconsider the group and try to go back and see what happens.

Take care
:hug: :hug:


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## ladylore (Mar 25, 2009)

I'm not quitting - a bit frustrated however. I will see what next week brings. Maybe one on one is the way to go with me. I don't know.


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