# Daily Life With Dysthymia



## Wynnteri (Oct 2, 2012)

I wonder, is this all I can expect for a "normal" life. Never feeling life like others seem to. Not seeing the world in vivid color, instead it's all muted. Never being truly full bodied happy. I use to have belly laughs all the time.... I'm lucky if I can feel that kind of joy once a year now. I was suicidal as a teenager & everyone told me it'd get better...... I'm not suicidal anymore, but that's the extend of the "better" everyone said..... It doesn't seem worth it to me. How do I learn to be 'happy' with what I have? How can I settle for something that isn't everything I thought it would be. Mental Illness is a stigma I wouldn't wish on anyone, & yet I feel like I made it happen by not being "stronger" or not having a "thicker skin".


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## Banned (Oct 3, 2012)

Hi Wynnteri,

are you currently in therapy or on medication?  I don't know anything about you but I do know that there is a much better life out there for you.  I was initially diagnosed with dysthymia as a teen and remember that hollow, emptiness hat seemed to dominate my life and suck all joy out of me.  It got a bit worse before it got better but it was worth fighting for.  Often the right combination of therapy and medication is needed and there are some great resources here as well that cn provide some guidance.

so in short, no, this isn't all you can expect for a normal life.  And thick skin doesn't make anyone immune to mental illness.


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## Wynnteri (Oct 3, 2012)

I've been in therapy off & on for over 20 yrs. I've been on meds for about 6 yrs. It's not really working like I thought it would. 
Zoloft is the med.


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## Banned (Oct 3, 2012)

You may need to return to your doctor and get your medication reassessed.  It is not uncommon to try a couple different ones before finding the right one or combination.  If it were me that would be my starting point (and actually that's exactly what I'm doing next week.  My meds aren't working as well as they could so I'm meeting with my doctor to see what we can change to get better results.)


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## MHealthJo (Oct 3, 2012)

I think there's definitely a tendency for a lot of people who need these medications to find themselves not being a really "demanding medication consumer". It sometimes seems to be the nature of the beast... people having thoughts like they are "being a bother"; being so used to feeling bad; utter lack of energy... plenty of difficult factors.

It's difficult, but we sort of can't afford to not be a really informed, exacting consumer when it comes to medications, in a way. There are SO MANY medications out there now, and always more to come. Knowing exactly what to expect from them, though, can be quite difficult for the very people who use them. 

David Burns' Feeling Good has an excellent consumer's guide to antidepressant medication, what to expect, and how to work on getting satisfactory results.

Personally, I do feel like this "happiness" idea is an extremely complex concept and maybe for some, it can't be fully pursued or explored without also delving into things such as philosophy, spirituality and beliefs, and so on. Sometimes I wonder if to a degree there's like a genuine "cultural illness" of modern society, almost... I sometimes really wonder if modern western societies are very "conducive" to real hardcore, spinetingling, oldfashioned "happiness". Or something philosophical like that. 
I might blog about all of it at some point.

Definitely try to expect good things from a successful medication experience and your personal journey toward happiness... Keep at it and try tons of different "keys" - options and ideas in life - until you unlock some pretty good stuff. It can definitely take a LOT of time and a ton of patience with the process and with yourself.

 Wish you the best!


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## Wolverine (Dec 20, 2012)

Every day is seems the same day and every day the same bad feelings,i can't smile,i can't be enthusiastic,i'm saying no to everything,i don't want to be social,i don't know what to do with my life that sucks so bad.:undecided::undecided:


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## forgetmenot (Dec 20, 2012)

YOu take one step just one perhaps make it a different step and see what happens.  Have you tried newer medication  have you tried all ther therapies  have you tried meditation   What i am saying hun if what you are doing is not working then change it up a bit ok.   I do get it not wanting to do anything but do it anyways ok because depression will tell you it not worth it  but it is hun  YOu are worth the fight ok   hugs


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## Wolverine (Apr 3, 2013)

How i can understand if i have dysthymia symptoms? Sure i have symptoms more than 2 years,almost 6 years. eek:


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## MHealthJo (Apr 3, 2013)

Have you been able to speak to a doctor or mental health professional, Wolverine?


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## Wolverine (Apr 3, 2013)

1-2 times but nothing special,i stopped early.


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## David Baxter PhD (Apr 3, 2013)

Why?


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## Wolverine (Apr 3, 2013)

Too expensive for me..


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## Lida (May 6, 2013)

I can definitely relate to what you describe.  Life is fairly grey for me.  It has always been this way. I don't know what is the most realistic way of looking at this experience of life. Is it accurate to say if you are not happy then  you are in some way malfunctioning?  After all I am not hallucinating, I am not delusional or violent. I'll have to admit that it grates on me to get the "cheer up" message from society.  If I don't feel that life is funny or joyous, if I feel that people are fooling themselves into this positive state of mind, do I really need to take medication to change the way I feel? Perhaps I am just defensive but that strikes me as artificial . Somehow my negativity seems more honest than medicated happiness.  I am not advocating anyone else to take my lead. But if you have dysthymia as I assume from this website's description I do, beating yourself up for it is salt in the wound. If anyone chooses to medicate their way out perhaps they are doing the best thing. I know I suffer from this, and I don't mean I have this, I mean I suffer, sometimes bad, sometimes not so bad.  But I never consider myself insane. And honestly the happiest people I know are often incredibly shallow. Perhaps suffering gives the soul depth, requires us to look at this experience of life and question more.


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