# Failed suicide making me afraid



## Superiority Tails (Mar 21, 2007)

Is it common for people to become afraid when they failed to commit it? My life has been getting better and I a lot of interesting stuff has happen since. I have became afraid of mouthwash, sharp stuff and straight people. I'm bi sexual and I thought that with all the gay and bi hate the world has. I thought it would be better if I just died. My best friend Kate didn't think so and she saved my life. Since then I have gotten two gay friends. I found out that one of my other best friends is bi too. One of my gay friends is my best friend as well. I have three best friends. I have another friend that's straight but she wasn't treated very well and was bullied offend. I had two boy friends as well. Life is going well and I would hate to die from drinking mouthwash and being stabbed by a sharp object. I would hate to be beaten to death by straight people as well. I voted for the first time yesterday. Is my fear of dieing caused by me trying to commit suicide or is it something else?


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## Daniel (Mar 22, 2007)

> Is my fear of dieing caused by me trying to commit suicide or is it something else?



Of course, most people are afraid of dying, and the subject of suicide tends to make one very aware of one's mortality and the fact that everything is temporary.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

Thanks. Have you ever been threw that too? Either with a friend, yourself or other people you know? My boy friend lost his best friend threw suicide. He told me that it broke his heart and it took awhile until he could continue on with his life. He broke up with his ex boy friend after that happen. I think that losing his best friend caused his relationship to crash. I feel really sorry for him but he's better now though.


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## Daniel (Mar 22, 2007)

Well, even before attempting suicide years ago, I was constantly thinking about my mortality and the temporary nature of existence.  This was largely due to depression.  I still think about these existential issues though I wish I could mostly forget about them.   However, there is benefit in not taking life too seriously.


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2007)

i never actually attempted suicide but i was afraid of what i might do. this experience for me afterwards, when i was no longer feeling all that despair and hopelessness, felt like a brush with death. i realize all too well now how temporary and precious life is, and how completely irrevocable death is. you actually attempted suicide. you could have died. that is a frightening experience. i think you now know how much you value living. but don't let your fear of death or other fears stop you from living your life. live it to the fullest. make the most of it. life is a gift.


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## Daniel (Mar 22, 2007)

> I would hate to be beaten to death by straight people as well.



Well, statistically, at your age, you are far more likely to die in a car accident.  And if you drove for almost one million miles, you would likely still be alive.

BTW, our ancestors lived in much harsher circumstances than we are now in.  So we are primed by nature to think in more all-or-nothing, live-or-die terms even though most of us will die in old age by a chronic disease.



			
				ladybug said:
			
		

> but don't let your fear of death or other fears stop you from living your life.



This is a good point, of course, though the assumption is that one won't take such advice too far by sky diving or driving a moped.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

I did try to commit suicide and I know I would have died if it wasn't for Kate. The important thing is that I'm alive. I will try to make life the best ever. Kate is very special to me. She has always been there for me and I value her a lot. I'll do anything for her. Would it be okay to say that she has made my life better? I want to make my life the best as possible and I can trust her to help me out. Best friends help each other out and I think that with her help. I can do anything. Do you think so too?


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## Daniel (Mar 22, 2007)

> I can do anything. Do you think so too?



The best way to find out is it to try   So yes, and though no one can stop a moving train, most people sell themselves short.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

Thanks. Can Kate be my special friend even though I'm not in love with her?


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2007)

of course she can.  you two have a bond.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

Thanks. Do you have a close bond like that with any of your friends too?


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2007)

i have two very close friends. they're like family to me. very special.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

I think of Kate like a sister. Are they special friends as well as like family?


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2007)

yes they are. i am lucky to have them.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

Cool. I'm lucky to have Kate too. I hope you can stay like that forever.


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## Into The Light (Mar 22, 2007)

thank you. i wish you the same.


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## Superiority Tails (Mar 22, 2007)

No problem. Do you kiss them? I kiss Kate though.


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