# A few of the things that I hate about depression



## Jazzey (Aug 29, 2009)

The roller coaster of good days and bad ones, where the bad ones seem to last far longer than the good ones.

Spending days in bed, not having the courage to do the things that really should be done.

Finding it painful, physically to even do the simple things: showering, answering the phone for friends who are concerned, preparing meals, buying groceries...and the list goes on.  Speaking, thinking...

Feeling guilty because I just spent the last "x" number of days in bed, not doing all the things that I should be doing it...

This is a bit of a rant for right now.  So the next question is, how do some of you cope with those phases?  Do you force yourself to do those things even though it's so hard?


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## Banned (Aug 29, 2009)

I can relate, Jazzey.  I really can.

As to how I cope, sometimes I will force myself to do the smallest things.  Today, for example, I really wanted to stay in bed.  I also wanted to go pick up a package at the post office but really, it would still be there in a few days.  I decided that's ALL I would try to tackle today.  So I got up, had a shower, went to the post office, picked up a few things on my way.  Now I'm home, and wanting to do laundry, clean my room, get ready for vacation, etc.  So I know that in order to get energy I have to spend energy, but I keep my goals small so I can succeed no matter what.

I also try and be a bit proactive.  I book app'ts for early in the morning so it forces me to get out of bed.  I try and also give myself time in the afternoons for a nap, because I know I will need it.  I try and find something that I might want to do.  I don't necessarily have to do it, but sometimes, if I think about it long enough, I'll decide it's worth getting out of bed for.

I don't let myself feel guilty about the days where I do stay in bed.  I used to, but found that isn't productive for me.


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## Jazzey (Aug 29, 2009)

Thanks Turtle .  I'm actually going out to diner tonight.  And I'm a little worried because my words aren't coming easily to me today.  Luckily, it's with a good friend, so I think she'll understand.


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## ladylore (Aug 29, 2009)

Keeping it as simple as I possibly can. And praising myself for anything that I have accomplished.

I gravitate towards veggie markets instead of grocery stores so I only have to pick up stuff for that day or meal. Strange as it is, I become vegetarian during my worst depressions. Eating only raw fruits and vegetables, if I have no energy to cook.

But mainly it is about the little things. If you manage to was a dish that day - celebrate. Then wash 2 dishes tomorrow. Take what you want or think you should be doing and cut it in half or a quarter.

If I was there I would come over for coffee and sit on your back porch or front steps (if you have them) with you and shoot the breeze. Nice and easy.


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## Jazzey (Aug 29, 2009)

> If I was there I would come over for coffee and sit on your back porch or front steps (if you have them) with you and shoot the breeze. Nice and easy.



And I'd like that very much  :hug::hug:


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## ladylore (Aug 29, 2009)

I have some of my best times that way. :hug:

I must have lived on the east coast in a past life because I love kitchen parties too.


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## Into The Light (Aug 29, 2009)

i'm trying to remember how i got through it.

i know part of recovery is forcing yourself to do _something_, as hard as it is.

for me i found the mornings the hardest, and as the day wore on when evening hit i'd finally feel a bit better.

i agree with picking a small goal. accomplishing it helps make you feel better about yourself.

music really saved me in the mornings when it was at its worst. it picked me up. put on lively, non-depressing music. it really helps.

this is a tough one but try to get some physical activity in there, even if it's just walking if you can't manage jogging. getting your heart rate up is the goal, and it really does help. the tough part is getting yourself to actually do the exercise.

be kind to yourself. don't beat yourself up for being depressed. that's like beating yourself up for having a heart condition, or diabetes.

one thing that really helped was having someone who cares about you visit. social interaction can be hard but if it's the right people it can make a difference. i am glad you are going out tonight.

the other thing that helped me get through was the support i got here on psychlinks, when seeing actual people was too much to handle.

jazzey, i know you feel like hell right now, but don't give up. handle just a day at a time, don't think ahead. it _will _gradually get better.


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## binqs (Aug 29, 2009)

Sweetie!

Lost the link; laptop died and now the cat won't let me type!  Lots of good advice; baby steps, baby.    Missed you a lot.  My i'net is spotty, but not my friendship.


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## Jazzey (Aug 29, 2009)

Actually, I'm starting to suspect that today was dissociation.  The minute I started talking to my friend, I was back so to speak.

Sorry, it's still really hard for me to distinguish between dissociation and depression some days.  At least lately anyway.  Mentally, they're very similar for me right now...

But I'm back, and I actually feel better.  One thing I'll have to remember that works  - talk to someone in person (the phone doesn't cut it for me).


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## Banned (Aug 29, 2009)

Glad to hear that, Jazzey.

I find conversations can help me as well as far as keeping me "in the moment".  Otherwise, the thoughts overtake my head...and I can't bring myself back.


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## forgetmenot (Aug 29, 2009)

Making early appointments something i do too to get me out of bed. Use what little energy i have for just important things. Sometimes answer phone only to people i want to talk to. Screen all calls now. Glad to see you getting out with a friend socializing does help. Taking a walk somewhere quiet no noise helps as exercise and fresh air sometimes helps. take care


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## suewatters1 (Aug 29, 2009)

I don't know what to say but I am thinking of you
For me was finding the right medication and the right dosage.  But everybody is different.

Sue


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## NicNak (Aug 29, 2009)

Jazzey said:


> So the next question is, how do some of you cope with those phases?  Do you force yourself to do those things even though it's so hard?



If it were not for the physical tiredness and feeling like my feet weigh four tons and my head six tons.  I think it would be just a tad easier, if I could move myself.  

Once my body seems to start liking me again, and I don't feel like a big lump. That is when I will force myself to do things, even though mentally I do not want to.  Usually a few days after that the big depression starts to lift again where I can function better.


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## forgetmenot (Aug 29, 2009)

I usually just stay in bed the only time i force myself is when it doctor appointment. I really try to keep them.  Even work sometimes choose to just not go.  Never force myself because i know the energy is just not there so useless to try.  Eventually someone needs are more important and thats what gets me out of my bed and house then i am exhausted and return to bed again. No never force myself its just too tiring.


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