# High School Boyfriend Still Smoking Cigarettes In The Field Behind School



## David Baxter PhD (Apr 1, 2009)

Your High School Boyfriend Still Smoking Cigarettes In The Field Behind School
_The Onion_, Issue 45?14 
lMarch 31, 2009 

THE BALL FIELDS?According to witnesses at your old high school, the guy you let touch your boobs after the Queensr?che concert still takes off shortly before lunch every day to sneak a smoke behind the dugouts. 

Although he can no longer fit into the filthy army jacket that used to impress you, sources confirmed that the paunchy, middle-aged man clumsily rolling his own Bali Shag cigarettes and hassling passing freshman is in fact the same boyfriend you defended to your mother almost two decades ago. 

It was not immediately apparent whether the 40-year-old claims adjuster is still trying to cheat on you with Jessica Ruffino.


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